natospec
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Post by natospec on Feb 27, 2012 9:18:49 GMT
now I know this is an odd and out of place post, but for the life of me I cant sleep because if it. i know you fellows have no connection to the current tragedies that have hit my town and my fellow students, but one in particular is plaguing my mind. a 17 year old boy by the name of joseph kearney that i go to school with shot himself on Wednesday. that isn't the issue that is bothering me the most, it is why he did it that is. i cant particularly say i liked the guy, he kind of pissed me off. but for some damned reason i cant get the... idea of him shooting himself in the head for no reason whatsoever to get out of my head, i purely just cant understand it. the other two kids who also died did so during a stupid game of chicken with they're cars... they got what was coming to them sadly. but... i don't know, joey always seemed like a happy, if not spoiled kid. it purely doesn't make sense that he would do such a thing... i guess the main reason its keeping me up recently ( i haven't slept right since his uncle told everyone at a small meeting of the senior class up at the nearby beach lookout point that he had shot himself. and that was the day after it happened ) is because my mind is trying to wrap around why he would do such a stupid thing... it just seemed off... and i guess i kinda will miss the guy, even though he was a prick... i don't know. im not even sure if i really should feel as little as i do... i mean, the first thought that came to mind when i was informed was "i dont really care" but... even that i guess isn't true... maybe ive been lying to myself to make it seem like it is less than it really is... things like death haven't really effected me as much as i think they should have since my mom passed away 10 years ago come july of bonemarrow and lung cancer (i think they called it multipul myoloma)... i guess i never really came to terms with that either... i suspect i never really will, and with that i am ok with... i dont know.... how am i really supposed to feel about a fellow student dying in such a reason less preventable way? sorry for laying out my story of confusion here, but the people around me seem to not have anything useful to say about it and i found you old owls to have a helpful word on just about everything
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Post by PinkFloyd on Feb 27, 2012 9:39:29 GMT
When you see people your own age dying (whatever the circumstances) you begin to question your own mortality... it's worse if you're young because most youngsters have a period in their life where they truly feel immortal and think they will live forever. If anything, this will hit home the fact that you are NOT immortal and that is quite a wake up call for one so young. I'm not good at giving advice in the matter of death... it happens and we all have different ways of dealing with it... I choose "denial" and refuse to go to funerals and disassociate myself with the concept of death... when it happens to me I won't know about it, in the meantime I choose to give funerals and graveyards a very wide berth. As I say, I'm not the best at giving advice
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natospec
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Post by natospec on Feb 27, 2012 9:42:07 GMT
When you see people your own age dying (whatever the circumstances) you begin to question your own mortality... it's worse if you're young because most youngsters have a period in their life where they truly feel immortal and think they will live forever. If anything, this will hit home the fact that you are NOT immortal and that is quite a wake up call for one so young. I'm not good at giving advice in the matter of death... it happens and we all have different ways of dealing with it... I choose "denial" and refuse to go to funerals and disassociate myself with the concept of death... when it happens to me I won't know about it, in the meantime I choose to give funerals and graveyards a very wide berth. As I say, I'm not the best at giving advice well... i guess you will live forever if you deny death as a possibility...
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xerxes
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Post by xerxes on Feb 27, 2012 15:58:47 GMT
Whas it a deliberate act of suicide, or did he accidentaly shoot himself while handling a gun?
If it was suicide, I experienced something similar when I was about 18 or 19. There was a guy that I knew quite well at college, not one of my closest friends, but certainly part of a group of 20 or so that I hung around with both inside and outside of college. After leaving college I lost touch with him a bit, but would bump into him now and then and we did go out for a drink together on a couple of occasions. However, some months after the last time I met him, about a year after leaving college, I learned that he'd taken his own life.
I remember feeling guilty, and that perhaps if I'd made more of an effort to stay in touch and be a better friend that things may have turned out differently. I knew he had some issues, but I think in the end I came to realise that I couldn't blame myself, the guy had some problems, what teenager doesn't, but I wasn't to know how serious it was. In addition as a teenager myself I doubt I was emotionally mature enough to deal with them.
I don't know if you're experiencing the same feelings of guilt that I did, but if you are, I think you have to rationalise it and consider that, if he didn't ask you for help, how could you know, and what could you do.
I think people are often awkward about discussing death, espessially in tragic circumstances and end up saying something trite and unhelpfull, don't judge them harshely, they probably just don't know what to say.
In any case, I hope you manage to come to terms with it and start to feel better soon.
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XTRProf
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Post by XTRProf on Feb 27, 2012 16:11:09 GMT
Actually, I don't care. But when this happened again in US of A, I think it's about time that I write something about this sorry state of affair.
What happened to the people in the good old US of A? Don't the people value life any more, especially the youths? Why are there people going to malls and schools and become Rambos to mow down innocent people with semi automatics? What happen to the gun control?
Although there are also crazy people in Singapore as well as the Switzerland but even when given arms, as we have to serve NS, we don't go about in a bizzare way to kill. Just imagine we can easily get arms and bombs in the bloody army during military manourvers but we don't go about killing people enmass even when we have problems. Btw, we are teenagers of about 17 to 21 when we enter NS and really who don't have serious mental torture in the bloody army? It's all a matter of discipline to outgrow the torture to become a man in the army. The Swiss are even more disciplined in that they can take their semi automatics back home with rounds as well. Yet, we don't see people acting as life is so low that they can be taken just like that.
Really, I don't see what's the damn problem in America wrt this killing issue. I think the US government has to seriously relook into why there is so much hatred as to people going about killing innocents in a crazy way as well as why there is so much terrorists wanting to blow up a part of the US if given the opportunity. Something is breeding that's damn wrong there. I like the American society in general, as I studied there before, but something regarding this is clearly going awry.
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Post by gommer on Feb 27, 2012 16:19:09 GMT
It's a fact that sometimes even good and caring parents have the faintest idea about the reason behind their children's suicide. It could be simply because they are too sensitive and a simple twist of faith could make them decide to take drastic decisions. Not that i'm an expert on this subject, but i've seen a fair bit of in-depth documentaries on this subject and the tricks of the mind are a subject that intrigues me.
When i was at uni, there was also this cheerfull and friendly guy, loved by many. After exams he threw himself off a bridge. No-one understood, he even had good exam results. Twenty years gone buy and i forgot his name, but i'll never forget who and how he was, or what his face looked like.
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natospec
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Post by natospec on Feb 27, 2012 22:49:52 GMT
i think ive figured out why it bothers me. the fact that he was so young and i knew him, and that it sort of destroys the illusion of immortality with us teen folk. my wood shop teacher had a big talk with us for an hour about the whole thing. and yes it was suicide, no-one knows why though. apparently he did it with a zip gun (home made, throw away weapon, i have a few ive made myself, but non of them are working models, saftey first with this sort of device) that he stole from one of his friends.
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rowuk
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Post by rowuk on Feb 28, 2012 5:48:36 GMT
There are many takes on death. I happen to think that there is a time for all of us and when it is up, it is up. There is always a reason for suicide - from a stupid dare to a planned "execution". I lost my best friend when I was 12. He pulled a plastic bag over his head - and suffocated. He had experimented with not drinking until he didn't need to pee and eating only stuff that the body could 100% process to keep from crapping. I guess the reason for death was curiosity?
We can't check the circuit diagram of the brain. We can only model our lives so that people that have "questions" about life see that there ARE those that care. That doesn't help much when a stupid adolescent experiment goes wrong, but it can be the deciding factor elsewhere.
Take this as a calling for you and the others affected to become a more obvious shoulder to lean on.
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Post by nicoboom on Feb 28, 2012 21:27:48 GMT
Over here in Holland we had a shooting-incident in a shopping-mal. A young [and legal registered] member of a fire-arms club walked in and started shooting innocent people. It was in a place called "alphen aan de rijn", not far from here. In the end he killed himself before police arrived. Later research revealed that he had serious mental problems but nobody had done anything with this info. Moral of the story; guns don't kill people, people do. I have been a member of a fire-arm club too for many years and returned my guns during a burnout and getting depressed. People who really get depressed can not think straight anymore...if you really been there, you'll know. As you get older you will have to face your own mortality; it will knock on your door one day without making a appointment. Good thing you write about this, as "each small candle lights a corner of the dark"....
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Post by PinkFloyd on Feb 28, 2012 21:52:23 GMT
I'm depressed all the time (well.... on and off) all I get is the occasional desire to shout at people who are pissing me off in supermarket queues.... Guns are ILLEGAL in the UK (unless you are a toff) so the most damage I will be able to inflict on another person is with a pea shooter or kitchen knife (also illegal to carry knives).....
No reason AT ALL why the residents of the USA should all be walking about "legally" tooled up.... it's not the wild west FFS! Get rid of the guns and go back to peashooters / punch ups / blowing raspberries at each other.....
Walking about with a lethal weapon in your pants should not be "legal" anywhere.... too many idiots out there.... saying that, WHY, should a perfectly adjusted human being ( a non idiot ) be allowed to walk the street packing a weapon.... to protect himself from the idoits? The USA is totally f+kked up and the sooner guns are banned the better.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 28, 2012 22:26:31 GMT
This would need confirming from an American but AFIK it is not legal to carry a firearm on your person in the USA, though this law may vary from state to state. You can own a weapon and keep it in a "safe" place, some states even allow the car. A licence to "carry" is separate from a licence to own. The right to bare arms is in the constitution so would be an extremely hot potato for any government to scrap. They're much busier removing your rights, cut by cut and telling you it's for own good BUT that, of course, applies to most countires.
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XTRProf
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Post by XTRProf on Feb 29, 2012 1:37:17 GMT
I agreed with Mike. The gun control thing should be more control than now in the US. Make it a point to get nasty with those people who have illegal guns. Singapore I think (never check) is death sentence with guns or even ammos as it's illegal to have them. Well, I don't think in the US can go to such an extent. Also, make it a point not to issue license to anyone with even a small hint of insanity coming. They should be assessed by professional psychologists before being allowed near guns and after that maybe every 2 years. If they need the guns, they will definitely go for the checkup. Also, if their guns somehow landed with killers, they are also responsible for that and be banned from guns forever unless they can show why they should not be banned forever from gun licenses. Why should guns be readily available for some insane people to kill others or themselves? If the US have not "breed" to such an extent of people wanting to kill people or themselves, the control don't need to go to such an extent. Anyway, we are not still in the Wild Wild West days where we need guns to protect oursleves from thugs or bandits in the wild lands as we have very organised police and undercover operatives now. US just need to stop the breeding of killing insanity immediately to reverse this life is no value mentality. Or else there will be no future for the newer generations. As I'm writing this, I hear of another case of a school kid shooting spree with a pistol in the US over the radio being trialed. What a stupid way to go in the US.
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Post by sherry2012 on Feb 29, 2012 2:51:29 GMT
Thanks for that, it's much appreciated£¡
This member has been banned Alex
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natospec
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Squeal like a hawg! Yeeehaw!
when in doubt, the simplest and dirtiest fix will do, even if it is twisted wire and tape
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Post by natospec on Feb 29, 2012 5:21:25 GMT
Thanks for that, it's much appreciated£¡ This member has been banned Alex did i miss something inappropriate?
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XTRProf
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Post by XTRProf on Feb 29, 2012 5:25:58 GMT
Thanks for that, it's much appreciated£¡ This member has been banned Alex did i miss something inappropriate? He shot himself in the head?
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natospec
250+
Squeal like a hawg! Yeeehaw!
when in doubt, the simplest and dirtiest fix will do, even if it is twisted wire and tape
Posts: 384
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Post by natospec on Feb 29, 2012 5:31:25 GMT
This would need confirming from an American but AFIK it is not legal to carry a firearm on your person in the USA, though this law may vary from state to state. You can own a weapon and keep it in a "safe" place, some states even allow the car. A licence to "carry" is separate from a licence to own. The right to bare arms is in the constitution so would be an extremely hot potato for any government to scrap. They're much busier removing your rights, cut by cut and telling you it's for own good BUT that, of course, applies to most countires. in california, the only way to get a carry permit for a gun is a pistol permit, that you have to have served as a seargent or above in a california law enforcment agency for at least 10 years prior to retirement. but you can carry a single edge fixed blade sheath knife of any lenght as long as the entire knife or at least 4 inches of its sheath are clearly visable at all times. i myself carry a marine KA-BAR knife when i am not in school. but i would never use it as a weapon unless i was forced to defend myself, a knife is only a weapon if one chooses to use it as one. to me, a knife is a tool. only for use as a tool and nothing more. a blade and gun are neither weapons unless man chooses to use them as weapons. i feel strongly about having guns for responsible people because i was grown up around them in a controlled and safe environment, and shooting sports can be quite fun, relaxing and enjoyable. many of the guns used in crimes are illegal weapons though, so even removing them from the market wouldnt stop the crimes here.
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natospec
250+
Squeal like a hawg! Yeeehaw!
when in doubt, the simplest and dirtiest fix will do, even if it is twisted wire and tape
Posts: 384
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Post by natospec on Feb 29, 2012 5:33:37 GMT
did i miss something inappropriate? He shot himself in the head? is that what he said there? really now? that is innapropriet...
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XTRProf
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Post by XTRProf on Feb 29, 2012 5:44:37 GMT
He shot himself in the head? is that what he said there? really now? that is innapropriet... No, I was just pulling your legs as usual for fun. Pull the trigger on Alex as he will have the full answer. I mean pulling the trigger as in the sense of asking Alex just to keep up with the gunnery theme here.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 29, 2012 5:45:55 GMT
Thanks for that, it's much appreciated£¡ This member has been banned Alex did i miss something inappropriate? Check the member's signature at the bottom. This person is one of a network of Spammers for the product linked to in the signature. The email address was also familiar to me from previous Spamming episodes.She said she was from the U.S. but the email address was .cn (China) Before this member even had a chance to post, I sent her a PM warning that advertising would not be tolerated, and would result in instant banning. Alex
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XTRProf
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Post by XTRProf on Feb 29, 2012 5:53:40 GMT
so even removing them from the market wouldnt stop the crimes here. Oh, you don't know what goes on in the minds of people especially in the US of A now. Even though it don't stop crimes in the usual sense of crime, it will at least stop those innocent killing from at least those with deep hatred. It's good to say responsibility but when responsibility is not there there must clearly be a tough stand to things that many may not like. But I can tell you strongly that those who are "saved" before their time are up from the killing list, they will be very thankful to this tough stand on weapons. Will you like to be shot at by some bastards? I for sure don't and will bash whoever when I can catch him or her for that and hand him or her over to the law to deal with. Luckily, in Singapore, I don't have to do that or like to do that.
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mrarroyo
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Post by mrarroyo on Feb 29, 2012 11:18:39 GMT
Yes, we are the wild west in the USA, I will not comment on gun ownership nor on legally carrying one. However, John Wayne and Clint Eastwood (character) are OK in my book.
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XTRProf
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Post by XTRProf on Feb 29, 2012 13:43:57 GMT
However, John Wayne and Clint Eastwood (character) are OK in my book. Hmm, maybe these characters will give the youths a new face of life is valuable. Btw, most of Clint Eastwood's films until now depict the good up against the evil or insane. The last film I saw of Clint was the Gran Torino. Yeah, it still depicts the good against the evil but with an Asian twist to be up with times.
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