Rick..... hopefully you'll be feeling a bit "loose" on your B'day so I hope you'll answer this honestly.....
Could you ever see this place happening back when I was a pest on Head-Fi? I'd like to think you did have faith in me and would like to think you believed that we could make this place good which is why you followed me over from Goat-Fi....
It was a good move wasn't it? I need you to tell me mate. I know one thing for certain, this joint wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for your input.
I thank you from the bottom of my heart for every
second you spent on here.... you have made this wonderful place shine and I will
never forget that. You have also made me feel good as a person (and made me laugh on numerous ocassions) and I thank you for that.
This will be a lonely place without you for a long time but your spirit will prevail, dominant and guiding, always seeing, always giving in wisdom and merryment.
Rick (believe me this is hard to say out loud!) I love you.
Shine on.
Your friend, always.
Mike.
Wow Mike ! How does one respond to all that ?
Fisrt.Two way street bro,I enjoy my time here,get as much as i give,enjoy the lack of restrainsts even when I stray and I DO stray
,the freedon from oberbearing shackles a more mainstream web site would bring and yet,sometimes i wonder if I go to far and either self edit or worry for hours (sometimes days
) what to do,what is the right path.
On the one hand it can be refresshing to have a "freewheeling" so called monitor because it lets one get thew impression we are not so tight assed you can kick your feet up and yet again,not SO off the hook that I would not be taken seriously when the need arose.I beleive I have acted "one of us" mostly,we are after all a small tight knit group but yes,have had to from time to time "nudged" members when I thought it time.
As for "street cred" yes,I came here hoping i could help get this albatross of the ground and once in flight with a clear destination and even when you were in one of your now famous "Fk it.Closing up everything" moods (remember bro,love ya man so you gotta take this
) did what I could to talk you down from the ledge with the "do you REALLY want to be 5,000 strong ?
" type speech where yes,it was decided we can't and hell DON'T WANT to all be headfi do we ? Let them do what they do best and us what we are good at-nothing
So yeah,love and have loved my time here otherwise (as most of us know) I would not BE hear (no gun to my head notice..........)
which brings me to "my delicate position"
well to say I was good and everthing is gool would be a lie to make others feel good so while not all gloom and doom no sugar coating here either
1-Can't walk PERIOD ! I can get from the bed to "elsewhere" via a walker which is no more than a brace so I can drag myself from "A" to "B" and no more but hell,I still get there right ?
2-I am in my bedroom,in a fkn hospital bed (yes,the one with all the buttons
) a table for food and drink,my nightstand for "whatever",and a nifty laptop stand/table,This is where I talk to you knuckleheads from and THIS is where I try mightily to do my electronic projects from but damn,to say it is tight or that building ANYTHING like this was not a real b_tch would be an understatement of historical/call guiness (book not the beer
proportions
3-Today I signed the "do not resuscitate" papers and got my little arm band it being decided after a loooong discussion it would be best AND signed away my "critical care" rights and went "full" hospice there being nothing for me other than my will to live and guys,that is a LOT !
I am SICK AND FKN TIRED of these doctors and nurses waiting for my expiration date to go off and they are ! Trust me !
First,my doctor upon initial diagnosis gave me 2 months to live back in Sept-Oct
Welllllll,after the puke did everything to kill me via that life sucking chemo I am here PROOF they are not always right (@4 and counting
)
Everytime I went to even SEE this guy he was always taking MY number,where I think i can be,and cutting it or taking me into the office with one of those (i don't think you are facing reality) type talks
WHAM ! Didn't happen but was when i decided I no longer liked my doctor even though everyone else had nothing but preais,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Then again today "reinforcing" they are just trying to keep me comfy 'til the end and when one,"my guy" that comes in even though there is no need and a guy I actually like asked after the discussion turned that way ( I HATE THAT) "so how long do
you think you have ?" and i responded "Oh I don't know,a couple of months or so" and his immediate response of "anything is possible" it came to me that everyone is just waiting for me to DIE !
well screw them because I ain't ready dammit ! why is everyone trying to TAKE AWAY my optimism ? What is the fkn rush hmmmm ?
Besides, I still have sh*t to design and build after first designing and building a modest "eval" system even IN my limited work area and even IF my most commonly used tube these days is a frikkin" solder sucker due to diminished skills and my hearing not what it once was,
all about the MUSIC right ?
That and the journey which for ME includes deciding,building then listening to the gear which right now is "baby bites" in stature me no wanting to start anyrging TOO ambitious or expensive (just in case they
are right
and staying within "daytrips".........if i can get the friggin' parts that is.just this week I spent fkn $17 on a single toggle for instance (why oh why did i not add in the Superlux filter parts list if ONLY to "fluff" the bill so it wasn't all postage AND so the fkn thing would get built to my spec AND have the wife "place another order" her not realizing it is exceedingly hard to single source ANY project so the ealier in the day "2x Panel Mount TRS Cliff jacks cost less than the postage just as did the toggle/postage wellll.........................ain't happening is what so looks like the "getting ready to build the filter" may outlive ME dammit......
Anyway,Still here,still building (sorta
) and still me and for me ?
enough to get by
Thanks Mike,Thanks all
Rick out